April 2017 just may have been the fastest year of my adult life. Between my 200 hour yoga teacher training every weekend, keeping up with coaching, and the regular tasks and demands of taking care of my family...it was a busy one. Surprisingly, it was also one of the most rewarding in recent memory. There really is something to the concept that when we are challenged most is when the real growth happens!
Training to become a yoga teacher is something I've wanted to do for years. It was just pure luck and timing that it fit so nicely into my Clarity Project! When I started I was terribly nervous, feeling insecure and just all over uncertain as to what I should expect. I went in based largely on my gut instinct and did NOT ask a ton of questions prior about what I should expect. In retrospect, that was a good choice because I probably would have lost my nerve!
Once training began, it quickly became apparent that I'd have to face some fears, in particular teaching and speaking in front of others. I think in my head it seemed MUCH easier than it turned out to be in reality. Words that were perfectly clear during my own practice came out of my mouth a jumbled mess...or even worse I couldn't even FIND the words. My first few trial runs were rough, I'm not going to lie.
I live in a very artistic community and am lucky enough to live next to an accomplished actress. She caught me at the point of tears about half way through the training after a Saturday session and kindly enlisted her help in learning how to overcome my irrational fears of public speaking. A few sessions with her and I felt better...not GREAT but better. I practiced at home like crazy, kept in mind that it's all about helping OTHERS and not ME, and things got much better at the studio. As we approached the final weekend, I felt worlds more comfortable in front of the class, and starting getting a sense for what my own style would be.
I also found that going to yoga 6-7 times a weeks was insanely rewarding. I'm quite sure it's a sign that I'm pointed in the right direction if practicing that often was such a pleasure! Not only did I feel toned beyond belief, but it really led to a sense of great peace and awareness of my thoughts and body. That's one of the magical things about yoga, one that is often overlooked when we see fancy yoga poses on Instagram or hear talk about the "yoga booty". My teacher likes to remind us that the pose starts just when things get hard. Having a month of being encouraged to intensely focus during this time proved to be so strengthening for my mind.
I traveled at the end of the month...ALONE...which was a dream. Surprisingly though, away from my regular practice and lessons I found my sense of clarity and focus dissipating pretty quickly. In the end, I'm grateful to have had the huge challenge last month of facing my fears, and also for being able to step away and appreciate all that I had gained.
Now, the challenge will be finding a regular practice, determining how to contribute to others through teaching, my blog and social media and where things are going to go from here! Here is what I DO know. I want to share my wellness journey, and what I'm learning with as MANY people as I can. I want to get back to love, and always come from a place of sharing. HOW i do that may still be up in the air, but I'll get there! I'm working on a few things now that I can't WAIT to share with you soon!
Next up for the Clarity Project - exploring some hormonal issues I've been having and a general sense of cloudiness. I'm currently part of a Beta test that will help me better understand ketogenic diets and intermittent fasting. I do not need to lose weight...I'm clear on that! Although the details of this test are still confidential, ketogenic diets and intermittent fasting are getting more and more attention and I very much want to learn more. I'm doing this for my own mental CLARITY and to share with YOU when the time comes!
Much love, namaste...and happy MAY!